Honest and unflinching look at marriage and infidelity
Added 10/25/2009
There's this movie titled "Dinner with Friends" with Greg Kinnear, Andie Macdowell, Dennis Quaid, and Toni Collette which addresses marriage, and divorce, and one which I thought portrayed all the angst and strife that can afflict couples that have been together for a while. Well, "We Don't Live Here Anymore" does this too, but in a more honest and credible way. At heart it explores the issue of infidelity and dissatisfaction in marriages, as portrayed by two couples who also happen to be close friends. Hank and Edith (Peter Krause and Naomi Watts) & Jack and Terry (Mark Ruffalo and Laura Dern) are good friends who are unhappy in their respective marriages. Hank and Jack are both lecturers in a local community college (filming was in Vancouver, BC) and Hank seems to be experiencing a serious case of writer's block whilst Jack takes time off for the summer. Of the four main characters, I felt Hank was the most unsympathetic character, portraying a guy who is distant and aloof from his pretty wife Edith (Watts), and also a serial adulterer. Edith finds herself stuck in a marriage that does not give her any sense of happiness,yet unwilling to do anything about it, choosing instead to reach out to Jack (Ruffalo) who reciprocates, resulting in a torrid affair (they make it everywhere - in the car, in the woods, in Edith's house whilst Hank sleeps upstairs!). Jack, seems disconnected from his own wife, and rebuffs her attempts at reconnecting, and rediscovering whatever it was that drew them together in the first place.
This movie is basically about a couple of 'lost' souls - each individual is searching for some form of fulfillment, and not really attaining it. Laura Dern's Terry was the character I empathized with the most, and Dern pours her heart and soul into her portrayal of a sad and frustrated housewife who tries to desperately reach out to and reconnect with her distant husband. Ruffalo also does a credible job of playing a man who is so consumed with his need for Edith that he totally alienates his wife, ignorant of her needs, whilst struggling with the moral dilemma of his affair (yet unwilling to stop it). Watts shines as a woman who has so much to give yet is trapped in a loveless marriage. The sex scenes are portrayed in a brutally honest manner - ironically, it is not the scenes of adulterous sex that are hard to watch. On the contrary, the sex that Edith and Jack engage in may be animalistic but it also shows two people who are in true harmony with each other. In contrast, the marital sex that Edith and Hank engage in, as well as Terry and Jack, appear almost awkward and perfunctory - made glaringly and painfully obvious with the desperate plea by Terry in one sex scene with Jack "Look at me" she cries out repeatedly.
The pacing of the movie is just right - drawing viewers in as we get to know these flawed and conflicted characters, watching the marital dramas unfold against a backdrop of suspicion, guilt, anger, frustration - in short, all of the emotions that many couples experience in their relationships. This movie provides an honest and unflinching look at the unraveling of two marriages, the emotional cost of infidelity, and the compromises that people make in relationships.
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
A man and a woman and a man and a woman...
Added 10/8/2009
I patiently waited for something to happen in this film, and when it didn't I began to suspect that the movie might be French. As it turns out, my fears were justified.
Jack and Terry and Edith and Hank are four people who are quite unhappy. We don't know why. It doesn't really matter who is married to whom, because all the characters are pretty much interchangeable. The two men are academics who shave every third day, The two women are blonde housewives. They have affairs with each other. Nobody ever wants to talk. Nobody has deep feelings. Like Chinese water torture, melancholy music tinkles constantly in the background. Every once in a while there is a pregnant pause in which there is a startled look on someone's face, an ominous close-up of rushing water, a train signal, an intimation that something momentous is about to occur. But, these are just Braxton-Hicks contractions, fake-outs in the eternal Waiting-for-Godot labor of French existentialist relationships.
The French really do need to get over Sartre.
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
Jack & Terry & Hank & Edith
Added 9/21/2009
My first thought when I started WE DON'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE is...big deal...I can watch this kind of adultery and betrayal on my street or with my co-workers. Everyone I know seems to have daily train wrecks with their relationships and marriages....
But then I found myself drawn in by this movie.
I have a thing for Naomi Watts, I admit it, so I started watching primarily because of her, but all of the performances are excellent, even the kids. Add to that a really insightful, tight script and you've got a great movie about how unhappy marriages sink into routine and failure--and what each husband or wife does about it.
Even though I love Naomi Watts (not repeating it because I'm a deranged stalker or obsessed fan--but because I'm making a point), I have to say the most touching performance comes from Laura Dern. It's deceptive how bland her character is at the very start because she soon becomes the character we see change the most. She ends up becoming the heart of the movie. I really felt for her as she snaps out of her rut to finally start being the wife/mom she needs to be and cleaning that pig pen of a house--only to discover just how far her marriage has run off the tracks.
Not a false note here. I won't give anything more away so check it out. It doesn't feel like it came out of a screenwriter's computer printer, it feels like it happened across the street of your house...or maybe your own.
Having been through a divorce myself, there were several times I said aloud, "Yep, that's what that feels like...."
(If you liked this film, also check out THE SQUID AND THE WHALE, another film involving a disintegrating marriage with excellent performances).
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
Underrated and Overlooked
Added 9/3/2009
The acting is superb and the tale told in this screenplay adaptation of Dubus's novella is increasingly relevant for current times, where the focus on relationships seems to have shifted to a preoccupation with external events. In this movie there are no cell phones, blackberrys or cable news networks. Just actors turning in very believable and emotionally strong performances. Not to be missed.
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
portrays powerfully
Added 3/2/2009
There is a visceral quality to this story, spellbinding and heart-wrenching. It captivated me, and though painful to watch, the movie stayed with me for days afterwards. Two couples that are friends, with marriages in crisis, must face the growing despair of their infidelities, unrealized ambitions, and complacency at home. The performances of the lead characters were done incredibly well, especially Laura Dern.
The reviews of this movie stretch across the board, but everyone seems to have a lot to say about this film. It may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I think it's well worth watching.
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
Honest and unflinching look at marriage and infidelity
Added 10/25/2009
There's this movie titled "Dinner with Friends" with Greg Kinnear, Andie Macdowell, Dennis Quaid, and Toni Collette which addresses marriage, and divorce, and one which I thought portrayed all the angst and strife that can afflict couples that have been together for a while. Well, "We Don't Live Here Anymore" does this too, but in a more honest and credible way. At heart it explores the issue of infidelity and dissatisfaction in marriages, as portrayed by two couples who also happen to be close friends. Hank and Edith (Peter Krause and Naomi Watts) & Jack and Terry (Mark Ruffalo and Laura Dern) are good friends who are unhappy in their respective marriages. Hank and Jack are both lecturers in a local community college (filming was in Vancouver, BC) and Hank seems to be experiencing a serious case of writer's block whilst Jack takes time off for the summer. Of the four main characters, I felt Hank was the most unsympathetic character, portraying a guy who is distant and aloof from his pretty wife Edith (Watts), and also a serial adulterer. Edith finds herself stuck in a marriage that does not give her any sense of happiness,yet unwilling to do anything about it, choosing instead to reach out to Jack (Ruffalo) who reciprocates, resulting in a torrid affair (they make it everywhere - in the car, in the woods, in Edith's house whilst Hank sleeps upstairs!). Jack, seems disconnected from his own wife, and rebuffs her attempts at reconnecting, and rediscovering whatever it was that drew them together in the first place.
This movie is basically about a couple of 'lost' souls - each individual is searching for some form of fulfillment, and not really attaining it. Laura Dern's Terry was the character I empathized with the most, and Dern pours her heart and soul into her portrayal of a sad and frustrated housewife who tries to desperately reach out to and reconnect with her distant husband. Ruffalo also does a credible job of playing a man who is so consumed with his need for Edith that he totally alienates his wife, ignorant of her needs, whilst struggling with the moral dilemma of his affair (yet unwilling to stop it). Watts shines as a woman who has so much to give yet is trapped in a loveless marriage. The sex scenes are portrayed in a brutally honest manner - ironically, it is not the scenes of adulterous sex that are hard to watch. On the contrary, the sex that Edith and Jack engage in may be animalistic but it also shows two people who are in true harmony with each other. In contrast, the marital sex that Edith and Hank engage in, as well as Terry and Jack, appear almost awkward and perfunctory - made glaringly and painfully obvious with the desperate plea by Terry in one sex scene with Jack "Look at me" she cries out repeatedly.
The pacing of the movie is just right - drawing viewers in as we get to know these flawed and conflicted characters, watching the marital dramas unfold against a backdrop of suspicion, guilt, anger, frustration - in short, all of the emotions that many couples experience in their relationships. This movie provides an honest and unflinching look at the unraveling of two marriages, the emotional cost of infidelity, and the compromises that people make in relationships.
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
A man and a woman and a man and a woman...
Added 10/8/2009
I patiently waited for something to happen in this film, and when it didn't I began to suspect that the movie might be French. As it turns out, my fears were justified.
Jack and Terry and Edith and Hank are four people who are quite unhappy. We don't know why. It doesn't really matter who is married to whom, because all the characters are pretty much interchangeable. The two men are academics who shave every third day, The two women are blonde housewives. They have affairs with each other. Nobody ever wants to talk. Nobody has deep feelings. Like Chinese water torture, melancholy music tinkles constantly in the background. Every once in a while there is a pregnant pause in which there is a startled look on someone's face, an ominous close-up of rushing water, a train signal, an intimation that something momentous is about to occur. But, these are just Braxton-Hicks contractions, fake-outs in the eternal Waiting-for-Godot labor of French existentialist relationships.
The French really do need to get over Sartre.
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
Jack & Terry & Hank & Edith
Added 9/21/2009
My first thought when I started WE DON'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE is...big deal...I can watch this kind of adultery and betrayal on my street or with my co-workers. Everyone I know seems to have daily train wrecks with their relationships and marriages....
But then I found myself drawn in by this movie.
I have a thing for Naomi Watts, I admit it, so I started watching primarily because of her, but all of the performances are excellent, even the kids. Add to that a really insightful, tight script and you've got a great movie about how unhappy marriages sink into routine and failure--and what each husband or wife does about it.
Even though I love Naomi Watts (not repeating it because I'm a deranged stalker or obsessed fan--but because I'm making a point), I have to say the most touching performance comes from Laura Dern. It's deceptive how bland her character is at the very start because she soon becomes the character we see change the most. She ends up becoming the heart of the movie. I really felt for her as she snaps out of her rut to finally start being the wife/mom she needs to be and cleaning that pig pen of a house--only to discover just how far her marriage has run off the tracks.
Not a false note here. I won't give anything more away so check it out. It doesn't feel like it came out of a screenwriter's computer printer, it feels like it happened across the street of your house...or maybe your own.
Having been through a divorce myself, there were several times I said aloud, "Yep, that's what that feels like...."
(If you liked this film, also check out THE SQUID AND THE WHALE, another film involving a disintegrating marriage with excellent performances).
0 out of 0 people found this helpful.
|
